Sweet Home Alabama

Last year America’s finest news source broke the story that a leading public relations firm had advised the United States to cut ties with Alabama.

At this time, we believe it’s in America’s best interests to discontinue its relationship with Alabama,” said Hill & Knowlton senior partner Dylan Feldstone, adding that the United States and Alabama were “heading in two different directions right now.” “Please note that we are not saying there is anything wrong with Alabama. It’s just that as the United States works to maintain and strengthen its worldwide reputation, we believe it is everyone’s best interests if it parts ways with the state.

“We’re certain the state of Alabama will understand this,” Feldstone continued. “They know how these things work.”

Then this esteemed news organization offered this video to elaborate:

The story got local attention in Alabama as well.

We await the expected reaction from the usual parties.

7 thoughts on “Sweet Home Alabama

  1. Sandi Saunders August 11, 2014 / 4:42 pm

    People still take ‘the Onion’ as real news? But then again, they take Glenn Beck seriously too. LOL

  2. Schroeder August 11, 2014 / 4:51 pm

    LMAO!!!

  3. SF Walker August 11, 2014 / 5:44 pm

    Now that is some choice comedy!

    Neal Boortz once referred to the state as “Alabamastan.”

  4. Melissa Blue August 13, 2014 / 10:54 am

    I find this appallingly racist. Alabama is a State with one of the highest percentages of African-Americans in its population in the entire country (26%). And the Onion wants to remove that population from the United States? Hateful. What’s wors still, is that one of the States they wish to make the face of America is Utah, an ultra white State with an African-Ameriacn population of a mere 1.3%. Like I said, this is racist and it stinks.

    • Sandi Saunders August 13, 2014 / 11:24 am

      If it was real, you might have a point. “The Onion is an American digital media company and news satire organization. It runs an entertainment website featuring satirical articles reporting on international, national, and local news.”
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Onion

      • SF Walker August 13, 2014 / 6:16 pm

        Exactly. And, on top of that, racists are among the favorite targets of the Onion’s satire.

  5. Melissa Blue August 13, 2014 / 12:10 pm

    Sorry you misunderstood, but my post was satirical. If it was real, you might have a point.

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